Smells Like Petra Corr

Who is Petra Corr?

Yours truly is a work in progress living with cPTSD and a few other connected diagnoses from a lifetime of abuse and neglect. It is a singularly humbling and painful revelation when one realize that a multitude of ideas, behaviors, and experiences that were considered normal are, in fact, not normal at all. They were (and are) immensely harmful to one’s mental health and sense of self.

I made the choice to write under a pseudonym to protect my privacy as I am not ready for others to know what I am going through and have experienced. That said, writing helps me process big thoughts and feelings, hence this endeavor. I don’t know what I will include yet. I’m currently untangling the giant yarn ball that is me to remove the strands that are harmful or unhelpful conditioning, hoping that the end result is a still messy yarn ball that is authentic and truly me.

This process has required a lot of letting go – of unhealthy relationships with both friends and family, a career I thought I would retire from, and many ideas about who I am. This kind of transformation is painful. It is lonely.

It is worth it.

If you need help, please seek it. Therapy saved my life. I should have started sooner, but I let the stigma hold me back until I inevitably fractured and had no choice. Don’t make my mistake. Don’t wait. Reach out to a therapist, a crisis line, or a friend.